


Offering My Soul, My Flesh

by castielsstarr



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Mythology, Blood Magic, Blood and Gore, Cannibalism, Cunnilingus, F/F, Femslash, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-16
Updated: 2016-02-16
Packaged: 2018-05-20 23:46:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6030271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castielsstarr/pseuds/castielsstarr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ruby has worshiped Abaddon since she was old enough to make her own decisions about which gods and goddesses would be hers. After a time, she falls in love with this goddess who is nothing but a painting on a wall. A depiction of what once lived. With the right magic and enough dedication, though, could Ruby bring the dead back to life?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the SPN Reverse Bang 2015! A big thank you to my super, wonderful artist, [pulledbackfromthatedge](http://pulledbackfromthatedge.tumblr.com), for drawing me such an amazing piece! This was so much fun for me to write (because yes, I am a little twisted) and I hope you all enjoy it!
> 
> NOTE: I purposefully did not use archive warnings because I don't want to spoil the story for you all. If you have to know before reading, go to the end notes on the last chapter.
> 
> ANOTHER NOTE: I have completely fucked with the whole structure of Angels, Demons and Knights of Hell. Roll with it.
> 
> Come hang out with me on Tumblr, I promise I don't bite:  
> SPN NSFW Multi-ship sideblog: [wingedwincest.tumblr.com](http://www.wingedwincest.tumblr.com)  
> Main blog: [castielsstarr.tumblr.com](http://www.castielsstarr.tumblr.com)

“Good morning,” Ruby spoke softly as she moved around the small stone room lighting the torches that lined the walls. She lit the hallway coming in, switching sides as she went. Then she would move to light all the way around the circular room—fourteen torches total. She counted them out in her head every time she came here. It was the exact same routine she had kept every morning for the past five months. Five solid months of talking to this woman for a couple hours a day.

Not once did she speak back.

With all of the torches lit, she came back into the center of the room to stand in front of the tall, black obelisk. It was covered in intricate paintings on each of the four sides, which she knew by heart. The elders had said they were images from another time, meant to depict the stories surrounding the god or goddess of the temple. All of the other gods had them, too, but Ruby always found a certain beauty in these particular ones, scrawled onto the walls that housed the spirit of her goddess.

Facing north, to the left side of the entrance, was a depiction of the river that ran through the town, the water tainted red. The waves were crashing against the bank, just like they always did, but it was tinting the sand pink. The image showed no source for the discoloring of the water, but it had always been assumed to be blood. There was red clay dirt in the area that could affect the river, but the color was never that vibrant.

East was home to an image of a pile of bones with a thin silver cloth draped over top. It was easy to see through the cloth to all of the skeletal remains. They varied, both in shape and size. The number of bones from arms and legs was astounding, stacked haphazardly on one another, building higher. There were also 20 skulls in the image, some clearly of a smaller size, once belonging to children. All were humanoid from what she could tell. There was no skin to be seen clinging to them, just the white, cold quality that bones seemed to hold when they were no longer supporting the human frame.

Southward was the depiction of a scene from the lore her people had always been told to scare them away from evil acts. Feminine hands clenched around struggling bodies, ripping them to pieces and inserting the remains into a giant, bloodied maw. The red of her lips bled together with the red of the people’s blood, and it was hard to tell where one ended and the other began. Parents would tell the lie to their children, reminding them that if they were to misbehave, the goddess would come and eat them.

It wasn’t until Ruby circled around and the west side came into view, the side facing the entrance to the temple, that her whole image could be seen. 

Abaddon.

The chaotic goddess stood at full height, just an inch or two taller than Ruby’s own, and was depicted in a gold and black dress. The ink had clearly faded and changed over time and the true color couldn’t be determined. Ruby liked to think it was green, though. Her favorite color. The front of Abaddon’s clothing was designed with bones—a full skeleton starting at the top of her spine and working it’s way down to the bare feet that rested flat. Held in between long fingers in front of her pelvis was the skull.

Where the ink hadn’t faded was her red hair. The color still appeared not far from fresh. With the way the artist drew those locks, Ruby couldn’t help but wonder what they would be like to really touch. Would they be soft or sort of wirey? How would they move and fall around her shoulders?

What always caught her attention in the image, though, was the crown of boney fingers that surrounded Abaddon’s curls. Little bones, one on top of the other to form an elongated digit. They looked like spider’s legs protruding from behind the goddess’ head. Abaddon deserved to have a crown, but Ruby’s dislike of spiders prevented her from looking at it for too long. It was a bit too unnerving for her.

The other thing that stood out was a sort of necklace attached the the shoulders of the dress, not around her neck at all. The cord was invisible against the fabric and there weren’t any spaces along it. Ruby had thought the small items were just beads at first, but after closer inspection one time, she was able to determine that they were teeth. All different types in different shades of white or yellow. She couldn’t tell if that was due to the fading paint or the whether those teeth came from different sources. Some appeared to be animal—the longer, sharper canines—but most were undeniably human.

Ruby placed the basket at the foot of the obelisk. She had carted it up the mountain that lay just outside of town. She tucked a small strand of dark hair behind her ear and her hands shook slightly through the motion. It didn’t matter how many times she came up here, she would always be nervous to talk to Abaddon. What if the goddess decided she no longer favored Ruby? She didn’t truly know whether Abaddon favored her or not, but it could be assumed since there was never anything trying to keep her from entering the temple.

What if today was the day she would get a response from the goddess? Other people of her village had received replies from their gods and goddesses of choice, so why would hers be any different? She just had to wait. She had to be faithful.

At the very least, she hoped to one day get any sign at all from the goddess—one letting her know that she had been listening when Ruby would speak to her in the soft tone she knew Abaddon would like. Every word rolled smooth from her tongue, not clipped or harsh. Her voice was laced with what could only be called adoration. Maybe a little hope, too.

“I brought you some food, in case you get hungry later. I only brought what I was able to get fresh—nothing that’s been preserved and stored.” Ruby knelt next to the basket and unwrapped the linens surrounding the contents. The pungent smell was quick to reach her nose, but she swallowed deeply to calm her stomach, which had tried to make a leap into her throat. Whenever she brought food to the goddess, Ruby knew better than to eat beforehand. She had made that mistake the first few times and found her breakfast spewing from her churning stomach.

Finally, she laid eyes on the contents of the basket. One heart, one liver and two kidneys. All were harvested early that morning during her trek up the mountain. There had been a bobcat she had come across off to the side of the path, freshly shot down by a hunter, but the hunter was nowhere in sight. He must have left to find a method for bringing the beast back down to the village. Ruby took the organs necessary and left the rest of the creature for its hunter.

Ruby gingerly lifted each meaty lump out of the basket and placed them on the slightly raised base of the obelisk. She sat back, knees tucked underneath her, with her hands upturned in her lap in an attempt not to get covered with any bits of blood and she smiled.

“I hope you enjoy bobcat,” she joked, but let the room fall quiet after. They sat in silence for a few moments before Ruby sighed and placed one hand on the stone against Abaddon’s painted dress. “I wish you could be here with me,” she whispered. “I feel like you’re the only one who likes me some days.” Her thumb stroked the edges of the painting, wishing she could feel the material of the dress running across her hands.

When Ruby looked up to Abaddon’s face again, she grew a bit confused. The face hadn’t moved, per se, but the expression on the goddess’ face appeared to have softened. Like she was pleased that Ruby was there. She didn’t dare look away for fear that the expression would change—harden again.

Ruby quickly rose and shifted forward, so she could touch the painting’s face. “I must be imagining things,” she spoke under her breath as she traced the slight lines in the older woman’s face. The artist had done everything in their power to portray her beauty, but to also capture her accurately. Such talent, and done how many years ago? She couldn’t remember exactly when the temple had been built or when Abaddon had lived, but it had been a long time.

“If only you knew I was here. And if you could be here, too.” She dropped her hand from the wall after a finger-light brush against the woman’s lips. She gathered the basket in her arms before straightening and giving a small smile to the painting. “I’ll come by tomorrow. Don’t go anywhere.” Ruby chuckled at herself before stepping down from the landing of the obelisk and snuffing each of the torches on her way out.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, this chapter is a bit short. I could not for the life of me get them to balance, so this one is short, and Chapters 4-6 are much longer.

The torches just would not light fast enough for her liking and she grew agitated the longer it took. Impatient. If it weren’t for the inability to see anything without the lights, Ruby would have forgone them every time. It took too long to get the damn things to burn and she just wanted to be able to see Abaddon’s face. There was something about her that Ruby found comforting, even though she now knew that everyone else feared her redheaded goddess.

Why would anyone be afraid of Abaddon, though? There was the one story that showed her in a negative light, but even then the details of it were vague. The elders gave them one story, their parents another, peers again more. Varying degrees of bloodshed and murder. Death and destruction.

What was always consistent was the dietary habits of the goddess. The stories told of younglings, mostly. Babies, often newborns. It should have unsettled her, caused uneasiness to rush her, but it didn’t. Everyone, even deities, had their flaws. They were allowed to be imperfect. 

Aside from that, she wasn’t anything like the other chaotic gods and goddesses. Abaddon supposedly wasn’t viciously murderous like Cain and didn’t want to infect other people like Pestilence. She wasn’t vindictive like War, or downright evil like Alastair. She was just misunderstood.

Much like Ruby was starting to be, it seemed.

With half of the torches now burning, she gave up trying to light the rest in favor of going up to the obelisk to stand with Abaddon. The tips of her sandal-clad toes touched the darkened stone where the proffered organs from the day before had sat. Whenever Ruby would bring an offering, it would always be gone the next day. Whether the goddess took them or some wild animal snuffled its way in here and snacked on them, she didn’t know. She liked to believe it was Abaddon. That the goddess had been pleased with her.

Ruby placed her right hand to cover Abaddon’s while her left reached up to stroke the painting’s high cheekbones. The stone was smooth under her hands, cool and soothing. But it wasn’t what she needed. She wanted to feel the real warmth of skin held tight to her body; the ability to feel another’s heartbeat against her. To have someone's breath easing comfort into her lungs through feather-light kisses.

She sighed and bent her head to rest against the stone. “They don’t like me anymore. The people of my village.” Her position held as she spoke, breath warm against her face where it returned to her. Ruby nuzzled her nose against the hard rock, her lips gently brushing it as she spoke. “I tried to tell some of them about you today. Just a few who I thought would understand. But they… they didn’t.” She swallowed deeply, the burn of tears starting in her throat.

“Most of them were quiet when I told them. Zachariah just stared the entire time—never spoke a word. But the quiet didn’t last long. Two of the younger girls, they started laughing. They didn’t even know who you were, but they chided me anyway. Told me I shouldn’t pray to someone who doesn’t exist. But that’s not true, is it? I know you’re real, Abaddon. You lived 1,000 years ago, just like all the other gods did.” Both of her hands moved to frame the face on the wall—an attempt at cradling it in her palms. 

“Raphael, though? He went right off. Yelling about ‘how could I do this to the town? How could I bring down this type of hell on earth?’ It was just ridiculous. I know you wouldn’t hurt any of them. I’m sure of it. I just wish there was something I could do to make them see it.

“I told them that you were kind. Nothing like the stories made you out to be. You wouldn’t do anything to hurt my people because they haven’t done anything to hurt you. Not since the time you lived, anyway. I know it was an awful thing that they did to you—binding you up in the town square, not feeding you for days. How could they hurt someone so beautiful?”

Ruby took a small step away from the obelisk to be able to look at her red-haired queen. Her hands trailed from where they rested near Abaddon’s face, down over her arms to trace again at the images of her hands. What she wouldn’t give to hold those pale, delicate hands. “I promise I’ll still believe in you, all right? I’m not going to stop visiting just because they don’t understand what it’s like to have unwavering faith.”

She smiled at Abaddon before taking a full step back from the painting, withdrawing her touch. “And I’m sorry I forgot to bring you something today.” The fine, copper rings that encircled her fingers made great toys as she nervously fidgeted. “I wasn’t thinking straight when I came up here. They had frustrated me and I didn’t have a chance to find something. I just needed to be here with you. I hope that’s ok of that you’ll forgive me.”

Ruby gasped when she felt a comforting warmth settle into the small of her back. It spread from her tailbone up to the middle of her back and she choked a little when the tears she had been fighting overwhelmed her. This feeling—it was just like when she was a kid and her mom would her rub her back in the early morning when her nightmares were at their worst.

She smiled wide, even with the salt on her cheeks. This was what she had been waiting for and it couldn’t have been anything else. Abaddon had finally given her a sign.


	3. Chapter 3

The next time Ruby made her way up the mountain to see the goddess, her spirits were high. Things were going well with the village currently and she had woken feeling better than usual. Abaddon’s acknowledgement the previous day had done wonders for her mood. She loved knowing that finally, after all the visits and offerings, the goddess had accepted her.

All of the torches lit easily that morning, as if Abaddon wanted to see Ruby as quickly as she could. With the starter light nestled into the empty holder nearest to the paintings, she ascended the small steps onto the obelisk and placed the basket to the side before rising just slightly on her toes to place a quick kiss to Abaddon’s cheek.

“It’s wonderful to see you today, darling. Our village was blessed last night, I’m happy to say. Half of the town has been praying to their gods and goddesses that our luck would turn and that the crops would start growing and it worked. The majority thinks that Hannah was the one who did it, a few others think it could have been Samandriel, but I don’t think that’s true. Do you?” She was grinning wide and when Ruby rose to kiss Abaddon’s image again, she placed it full on her lips this time. The happiness coursing through her was enough to make her bold. 

“They can think what they want to for now. But I know that it was you. Hannah might be capable, yes, but Samandriel doesn’t have the type of power you do. He must be one of the youngest gods, right?

“We used to learn about them from the elders when we were little. But they stopped teaching much about the history. I do wish we were able to know for sure when you all lived. How old you really were when you died. I remember from the few teachings about you that you were over 800 years when you passed. I wonder if it’s true.”

Ruby reached a hand up to run across the fall of Abaddon’s painted curls. “I think you’re probably older. More powerful than anyone suspects. I can feel it every time I’m here.” She paused to kiss the painting again before whispering, “You’re better than them.”

The same heat from the day before returned to her lower back and Ruby felt drawn to Abaddon, like she was being pulled forward—and she was, hard—against the stone. It was rough where her cheek pressed to Abaddon’s nose and mouth, but she enjoyed the feel of it. If she couldn’t have the real brush of the goddess’s skin, she would settle for the abrasive nature of her portrait.

That warmth at the base of her spine began to slowly travel up her back, across her left shoulder blade and it sunk its way into her hair. She rolled her neck as the heat pulsed, massaging at her scalp. Ruby giggled—and she was not usually one to giggle—as the feeling swept down the back of her neck and over the front of her shoulder. “Have I pleased you, my queen?”

She let out a small gasp and closed her eyes as that warmth cradled her breast. “I’ll take that as a yes.” It was starting to tingle against her skin and the feeling was simultaneously arousing and comforting, and she wasn’t sure exactly which outweighed the other. With a quick slide down over her side and hip, it returned to her lower back for one last pulse before the heat settled and faded. 

Ruby pulled away from the wall and smiled adoringly at Abaddon. “One day we’ll get to see each other in person, I promise you that. I—” Her voice faltered a little. What if the goddess didn’t approve of all of this, of her. As far as she knew, Abaddon had no problem with current magics, but it wasn’t like she was easily able to voice her input. “I learned of a spell. One that can bring you back to life. You could—” Another hesitation. “You could stay here with me. If you wanted to. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a companion again?”

She was hoping that warmth would flare back to life or, better yet, that the painting would actually speak, but neither happened. The room stayed quiet save for the slight crackle and flicker of the burning torches. Ruby tried to come up with something else to say, something that might get Abaddon to respond to her, but her mind was empty and her mouth was starting to cotton. She licked her lips and cleared her throat lightly before leaning down to pick up the normal basket she brought.

“They aren’t exactly as fresh as I had hoped to give you,” she said as she unwrapped the blue cloth from around the basket’s contents. “But I figured since they were from a woman it would be better than the animals I’m always bringing you.” She knelt then to place the four organs at the base of the painting like every time before. 

“She was already dead when I found her. She wasn’t diseased at all, so I thought that she might be of use to you. Her husband said she had simply passed of old age just hours before and that he needed help to remove her corpse from his tent.” The woman’s heart was gingerly placed on the stone. “He’s a frail old thing, so I offered to help take her to the burial site. He did not want to come with me; seeing his dead wife was just too hard. I couldn’t blame him.” The first kidney.

“I told him I understood and that I would take her down there myself and see that she was buried properly. It just played out perfectly, didn’t it?” The second kidney. “Nothing like two birds with one stone. Anyway, I hope it’s fresh enough for you. It’s a thank you for what you did for my village. It was very kind.” Finally, the liver.

A breeze flew about the room and fluttered her hair against her face. That must have been her acknowledgement of a job well done. Ruby folded the cloth up in the basket again and stepped back. “I’ll tell them about you tonight. All of them. I want my people to know it was you who did that for us.” 

She traced the edge of the curls one more time. “I…” She hesitated. “I just want you to know something. I’ve never said this to anyone before.” Ruby looked down to her toes when she spoke. “I think that… I might love you. If that’s ok with you.”

The wind whistled once more in agreeance before she stepped down from the obelisk to put out the torches.


	4. Chapter 4

Ruby’s hands were trembling as she tried to light as many of the torches as she had the patience for. She needed as much light as she could get since it was nearing late afternoon and it would be dark before long, but she gave up halfway through, slamming the initial torch into the stand on the left side of the stone monolith. She refused to climb the steps to stand in front of Abaddon and let the goddess soothe her. All she could do was continue to pace back and forth around the room and let the anger roll off her skin.

“You should have heard them today, Abaddon. All the hurtful things they were saying about us. I can’t convince them that you’re good; I’ve tried. When I told them that it was you who blessed us, they started to question me. Why had I been coming here to see you? Had I been asking you to do these things for me in their name?” She ground her teeth together in between sentences, unaware of the action.

“When I gave them the answers they wanted, they all drew away from me. Told me I was going to bring a plague down on our village.” Ruby paused in front of the painting and stared. “Abaddon, they wanted me to stop coming to you.” The stone woman stayed silent and unmoving. She shouldn’t have expected anything different and Ruby wasn’t sure why she did to begin with. Her breaths were coming shallow through her nose, her fists balling at her sides as her anger grew. “Do you even _care_?” Her voice rang harsh around the cavernous room, but still no response came.

It was such a deep silence that it took residence in her bones. Ruby couldn’t even hear the crackling burn of the torches. All she had was the buzzing noise of quiet and the feeling of her heartbeat pounding through her whole being. It was enough to drive any person insane.

“Fine, keep quiet.” She spat at the statue before stalking off towards the mouth of the cave. “But you will talk to me soon.”

When she exited, the sun was just starting to sink behind the mountains to her right and it was casting everything with a bright orange glow. It only served to remind her of the goddess and her bright red curls; something she wasn’t keen on at this moment. Why hadn’t Abaddon just given her a reply? Something, anything, to let Ruby know that she was still wanted. It was a constricting feeling in her chest—a snake twined around her heart—not knowing if Abaddon cared.

That’s why Ruby was out here in the chill air and almost dark. Her thin dress was not conducive for the weather this late in the evening, but Ruby was looking for the one final thing she needed before she might be able to talk to her goddess face to face. She had no idea if the spell would even work, but she had learned it by heart, knew everything that she would have to do. She just needed to get—

There was a rustle in the trees and she hid herself behind a nearby boulder, so she could get a look before moving in. A figure emerged from the brush; he was tall and lean, brown hair tousled and messy, not very muscular from what she could see. The best part of it was that he wasn’t carrying a weapon. The height could pose a problem compared to her small frame, but without something to defend himself, she figured she could take him by surprise.

Ruby searched nearby for a rock that would work and found one. Heavy, blunt—enough to knock a person unconscious when struck at the back of the skull. The man looked around when he heard the rustle as she picked up her rock, but he still couldn’t locate her. It only took a few moments for him to shrug off his alertness and move on, giving Ruby a chance to sneak up behind him, her feet silent on the dirt road.

The force she used to bring the rock down on the back of his head jarred her shoulder and for a second she wasn’t sure if it was hard enough. He staggered and dropped to one knee, but didn’t fall. Ruby’s eyes grew wide and her hands clasped tight around the rock started to tremble. If he stood up and turned on her, she would not win. Running from this man wouldn’t work either, so she did what she felt was her only option—she brought the rock down hard again on the crown of his head. It worked and he went down, falling face-first into a small cluster of dead leaves.

Dropping the rock, she quickly spun the man onto his back before grabbing hold of his wrist and tugging. He was heavy and the debris on the road only served to slow her down, but she wasn’t a far distance from Abaddon’s temple. She had to be quick in getting him inside, in case he wasn’t out here alone. She didn’t need someone to stumble across her dragging an unconscious, bloodied person into the temple of a Chaotic goddess. Granted, they might not know that’s what it was since from the outside it just looked like a cavern entrance. Either way, it didn’t look good.

She grunted and swore under her breath as she continued to pull him closer toward that darkness. The lights from inside weren’t able to reach the mouth of the temple, so it remained ominous. Two boulder lengths left and they would be inside and safe.

“Garth?” 

The voice was far off, but unmistakable. This wasn’t just a nervous echoing her ears created. There was another person on this mountain with them and if she didn’t hurry up, she was going to be caught. She looked as his chest to make sure he was still breathing. The rise and fall signaled that he was still alive, so at least she had that working for her if she was caught. She could pretend that she found him and was trying to help. The people of her village had a very strict “eye for an eye” policy that didn’t bode well for those intending to kill a person.

Ruby tugged harder at his arm, pulling him quicker than before across the dirt and leaves until she had him inside the temple and around the corner from the opening. She fell to her hands and knees then, chest burning from the exertion and her lungs trying to suck in air. Gasping and coughing a little, her lungs eventually settled and she climbed back to her feet. The man, Garth, was still lying motionless next to her. She hoped he would stay under for a while longer.

Grabbing hold of his wrist again, she continued to drag him down the narrow entryway and into the open room where Abaddon stood, vibrant curls and bared-teeth smile still unchanged. Ruby was able to maneuver him onto the base of the stone monument with some more tugging and a bit of rolling. Her anger had muted some, but her frustration at how much work it had taken to get him all the way in here fired her again. She would make this work. She _needed_ to make this work.

With his body finally supine, she took the moment to untie the satchel she had wrapped about her waist. The other ingredients were wrapped in their own cloths and tied off with a bit of twine. She fished her hand into the bottom of her bag and pulled out a small brass bowl, no bigger than the palm of her hand, and her knife. The knife that has seen her through so much already and would be an instrument in bringing her closer to the woman she loved.

He still wasn’t stirring and Ruby couldn’t tell if it was a blessing or not. She didn’t know how fresh the kill needed to be for the spell to work, but she didn’t want to take the chance of it failing. The hilt of the silver knife felt heavy in her hands and she turned it over a few times, figuring out the best method. 

Yew arils. Feeding those little seeds to him would be the first step. The original measured dosage she had wrapped in the white cloth was surely enough to kill him, but all she needed right now was a coma to ensure he wouldn’t wake and ruin her process. The kill would come later, by her own hand. Ruby wanted it to be as fresh as possible because she felt the compelling desire to show Abaddon how much she cared and what she was capable of doing in her name. She would be appreciated for her work.

She untied the twine holding the cloth closed around the seeds and poured them out into her hands. The man was slight; he wouldn’t need the full amount that she had calculated for a normal-sized person. She set a few extra aside that she didn’t think would be necessary.

Ruby’s hesitation got the better of her. Could she actually do this? Before she could get caught in the endless spiral of questions, she took the knife and placed the first cut. It was vertical on his chest, from the hollow of his throat, down to the bottom of his ribcage. Blood started to seep from the wound as soon as she made the cut, but her knife cut through his skin like butter. Well… if butter took five pounds of pressure to drag through, anyway. But the cut was clean with minimal tearing along the edges of his parted flesh.

As the wound continued to bleed, Ruby stood and quickly looked around the room for a rock that would fit the task. She found it sitting near the image of the bloodied river. It was large—bigger than could fit between her two small hands and weighed as much as one of the young sheep that were trotting about their farmlands. It wasn’t entirely smooth, but lacked any seriously sharp edges that could cut her. It would suffice for cracking open a bone.

When she climbed back to her position, with the man’s body positioned between her and the goddess, she kneeled and set the rock to her right before setting her focus back on the blood. It was dribbling down the sides of his ribs and over the man’s sore excuse for pectoral muscles. Reaching toward the top of the cut, she faltered once before placing the tip of her index finger inside and running it down the length of the wound. The skin parted around her finger, making way for her intrusion. Ruby could feel the bone rough under her touch and she shivered.

She placed a second finger inside the incision and scissored them apart at the center of the man’s sternum. The skin stretched tight and didn’t want to give much. Just as well; she could easily make a bigger cut. The knife back in her hand, she started under his collarbone and made a long slice, one on each side, until they met with the first. This allowed her full access to everything in his chest cavity—everything she would need.

With his skin now flayed back, his sternum—that thick bone that she would have to make her way through—was fully exposed. Knife down, rock up—she got to her knees instead of sitting back on her heels. She rolled the stone around in her hands, finding the right edge before bringing it down hard once, twice, three times, to strike the same place inside his chest. The crack of splintering bone sounded on the second hit, but she used the momentum to bring it down again to make sure she was all the way through.

What she hadn’t taken the time to notice earlier was the blood that had splattered her white dress with each strike. But when she did look, a tiny smile tugged the corner of her lip up. The hem of her short dress was just starting to soak up some of the blood where it draped over the tops of her knees. And the splatter? Well, it looked almost… festive. Like the tiny, red berries that grew in the bushes near her home in the winter time. She choked on the laugh as it wormed its way up her throat. 

Ruby realized then that she was starting to crack. Her emotions swinging in every direction and without much time between—this must have been what insanity felt like. There wasn’t time to think further about it and she shoved the idea off, looking back down to the person in front of her. He’d be dead before long. Maybe less than a minute or two left.

Her hands both reached for bones to clear out what pieces she had broken. Most of the ribs had cleanly cracked away at their junctures, it was just the sternum that was the issue. The bone was resilient as hell, and while she had chipped away parts of it, it still remained mostly intact. Bone fragments removed, she was able to get her fingers under the remaining chunk and lift. It didn’t come easy, but she was able to wrestle it from the chest cavity.

The inhale of breath wasn’t quite a gasp, but an awed noise. His heart still barely trembled inside his chest and it was a marvel to see an actual human heart beating. Abaddon must have been one of the few people to have seen something like this and now Ruby was part of it, too. 

Pulling herself back to focus on her current task, she picked up the small brass bowl and settled it onto her lap. Each pre-measured pouch got emptied into it—mullein, huckleberry leaves, and the ground dust of a crystal left out to absorb the moon’s light. The last thing she needed was her blood. With the knife pressed to her palm, she sliced across the length quickly, giving only a slight grimace at the sting. Her blood dripped softly and steadily into the bowl, the thickness of it sluicing through the powdered ingredients and mixing them together.

She set the bowl aside and stood to grab the closest light. Upon bringing it in contact with the ingredients, the mixture sparked and smoked, and Ruby replaced the torch in its holder. It was going as it was supposed to thus far, and she couldn’t really believe it. Sure, she had hoped it would work, but there was no reason that she should have trusted the spell she found. The book was old and most of the magic people practiced these days wasn’t real. But this? This was.

Ruby knelt back down beside the man and glanced up at Abaddon. Nothing had changed and she couldn’t say she wasn’t disappointed. Any sort of sign was all she was looking for, but she was granted nothing.

Ruby turned her face down to Garth’s body and slowly slid her hand around the side of his heart, letting her palm rest against it to feel the way it still just barely pumped. She smiled softly, almost fondly, at the small tremors before sliding her knife through all four veins that connected the top of the heart to the rest of his body. Her hand slipped under the muscle to cradle it as more blood rushed to fill his chest. One more slice through the connection under the heart and it was freed.

The ancient lettering on the knife glistened as blood settled into the etchings. It dripped onto the stone beneath where it was placed next to Ruby’s knee. Her spare hand reached for the bowl with still lightly-smoking ingredients. Garth’s blood on her hands smeared the brass as she placed it inside his now-heartless chest cavity. The bowl all but floated in the pooled blood, and her stomach turned slightly. 

Ruby took a deep breath to settle herself and with his heart in both hands, she sat staring at it. Her blind rage from earlier had softened and she looked at the stilled muscle with something akin to confusion. She hadn’t thought she would actually get this far along. And now? Now, all she could think about was the next and final step.

This heart had to find its way into her stomach. 

Could she actually go through with this? Ruby gulped as some remaining blood trickled out from inside of it, slicking her hands further. The feeling of it was unnerving, but not for the same reason as the thought of eating the heart. It was familiar and almost arousing. She ran her fingertips together, smearing it around her skin. It was so close to being the same thing she could feel between her legs on those nights when she was up late and all alone.

Looking at the heart again, Ruby decided she needed to do this now, before she completely lost all nerve. As much as she was afraid of what she was doing, she knew she needed to see Abaddon. It had been long enough—she had been patient—but she needed this. Before she could second guess, she brought the muscle to her lips and took the first bite. 

She tried her best not to think about the reality of what she was doing and just choke down bite after bite. It was tough and chewy, and where she had expected it to have more of a defined taste, all she was really sensing was the blood flowing into her mouth and washing down the flesh. However, that didn’t make it any more palatable.

Half of the heart was gone before she started struggling to swallow the mouthfuls of person. She had to breathe in and out through her nose as much as she could for fear of what would happen if she kept her mouth open for too long. Her only options really were scream and vomit at this point, neither of which would be helpful to the situation.

Ruby shifted and felt something pull against the skin on her knees. She looked down at her lap and saw that the front of her dress was now entirely red from all the blood that had dripped from her hands. It was sticking, pulling at the fine hairs on the tops of her thighs, matting itself to her stomach. With the remainder of the heart still cradled in one hand, she untied and removed her dress, tossing it aimlessly beside her.

One more deep breath and she took another bite—a larger one than normal. This needed to be finished. Ruby barely chewed her way through the remainder of it until she reached that last mouthful. It sat there in her hands, mocking her, and it was then that she well and truly thought she might not be able to go through with it. The contents of her stomach roiled and groaned, and the chances of it all coming back up were imminent. She needed to keep it down. She needed to finish what she started.

Face set and hard, she brought her eyes to scan Abaddon’s image once more. Her stare settled high and through a shaky but determined voice she said quietly, “I’m doing this for us.” She set the last bite into her mouth and almost immediately gagged. The meat had been cooling, the blood congealed. It was barely tolerable before, but now it was foul.

Ruby collapsed forward, supporting her weight on her hands against the painting. The muscles in her belly twisted and contracted, trying to force out that last bite and everything else along with it. With her head bowed forward and her brown hair falling to the sides of her face, she prayed. When she was done, she brought her gaze back up the portrait in front of her.

No change. Nothing at all.

She had wanted this to work more than anything and she failed. Ruby hung her head again as tears started to well in the corners of her eyes. Had she forgotten an ingredient? Forgotten a step? How could this not have worked? How could she still be—

“You did well, darling.”


	5. Chapter 5

Ice ran up her spine, followed by that familiar heat, soothing her. It was damn near enough to make her cry out, but with so many feelings fighting for dominance right now, she wasn’t sure which would win. Ruby stayed bracing herself against the painting, not entirely sure what she would find were she to look behind her. “Are…” She swallowed thickly. “Are you—”

“Really here? Yes, I am. You did amazingly, I hope you know. Only one who’s gotten a summoning spell just right and had enough power to bring back a god. Did you know that?” Ruby heard the shuffle of fabric against the floor. It wasn’t moving towards or away, just around in the space behind her. “Of all the gods and goddesses your people have and all the others who have tried to summon us, solely you have succeeded. What does that feel like?”

“I… I don’t know.” Ruby stammered. She dropped her hands from the stone and sat back on her heels.

“I’ll tell you—you should be ecstatic! It’s an impressive feat.” Her voice and the sound of moving stopped together. Abaddon’s voice came soft and low, “Are you not happy to see me?”

“No, it’s not that! I—” On her feet finally, she stumbled a little as she turned and the breath was sucked from her lungs by an unseen force.

Abaddon was more beautiful than her picture. The dress, once thought to be a green, was actually a pale blue; the color of the thin clouds that would settle over the village on a clear day. The material shimmered when she took a step toward Ruby. The bones that were patterned on the front were gone. Maybe they had been tangible and never part of the dress at all. What remained true was the crown of spindly bones and her vibrant red curls. Abaddon’s face showed fewer creases than her painted self, making her appear closer to Ruby’s age.

“Is everything all right?” She asked with a small smile. Her gaze flicked once over Ruby’s naked form before settling back on her face.

“Yes, yes, of course. It’s just… I didn’t think I’d be able to do it.” Ruby didn’t move from her spot, though she probably should have tried to cover herself. It wasn’t polite to stare down a goddess while unaware of one’s own nakedness. For some reason, it didn’t seem to matter as much as it would have with any of the other gods. Especially the Lawful ones, they would be ashamed to see one of their followers in such a state. Abaddon just looked pleased.

“You should have a little more faith in yourself, pet. I would even let you re-appropriate some of that faith you have in me.” She chuckled at her own joke and took a few more steps toward Ruby. Now standing at the base of the obelisk, with the tiny stone steps between them, Ruby got to be the taller one by an inch. Abaddon ducked her head demurely and fingered the side seam of her skirt. Bashfulness was a confusing look on a centuries-old goddess, but it made her more approachable.

Ruby took the steps down to stand with just a few remaining inches between them. She could feel the very edges of Abaddon’s skirt brushing at the tops of her feet as the redhead swayed minutely forward before retreating again. It was an odd motion—like she wanted to close the space between them, but wasn’t sure if she was allowed. 

“Is it ok—what I did?” Ruby softened her voice into that lower register, smooth and warm as the tea her people would drink on the nights of celebrations.

Abaddon’s hands found hers and she twined their fingers together, palms pressed flush in a downward prayer between them. Ruby gasped at the touch of this woman, her idol, and the chill it sent up her spine. “Yes, love. It’s perfect. You can’t know how much I’ve been wanting to see you—to talk to you. All things I couldn’t do before.”

“Why didn’t you?” Ruby gave her hands a short squeeze. The question wasn’t harsh or pointed, just a wondering. She had been asking herself all that time why the goddess hadn’t reached out to her more and, while she didn’t need a reasoning, she wanted one. “I was here.”

“I know you were, sweet girl. I wanted to, believe me. There were just things I couldn’t do at the time.” Abaddon rubbed the pad of her thumb over the knuckle of Ruby’s. “I didn’t have any power for a long time, but you helped bring it back to me.”

“What do you mean?”

“When they—” She swallowed before continuing. “When they killed me, they also performed a ritual to bind my power. It was an attempt to keep me from returning, but clearly they didn’t take everything into account.”

“Like what?”

“Like you.” Abaddon smiled at her, white teeth showing bright, and light filled her eyes. “They didn’t think anyone would love me. They sure didn’t, even though they were supposed to.”

Ruby cocked her head slightly. “You keep saying ‘they.’ Who are you talking about?”

Abaddon’s expression darkened and her smile fell. This new one held equal amounts sadness and disgust. “My brothers and sisters. They did this to me—killed me and locked me away presumably forever. Naomi, my father’s oldest, led them against me, but it didn’t take much persuasion for most of the others to join her. Hannah, Raphael, Castiel, even tiny Samandriel. 

“Poor kid, wouldn’t hurt a fly, but surprisingly he had no problem following the orders to behead his older sister.” She swept the red curls away from her throat, so Ruby could see the stitching circling the entirety of her neck. It was gruesomely done and it pulled her skin at harsh angles. Ruby’s right hand disentangled from Abaddon’s and covered her mouth as she stared at the knotted threading.

“Did it…”

“Hurt? Like you couldn’t imagine. You can probably see, it wasn’t the cleanest of cuts. I always thought my brother was cute, but I never said he was smart. He didn’t think to sharpen the blade first, so it took a couple hacks to really get in there.”

Ruby’s instinct told her not to look closer—anything but that—but still she angled her head and edged up to Abaddon until her knees and thighs were touching the material of her gown. Underneath the stitching she could how ragged the flesh was, jutting out in places, tucked under in others. Those edges were violent red and maybe a little black. It was enough to make Ruby’s head swim and sway on her feet.

“Ah ah, it’s ok,” Abaddon’s arms encircled Ruby’s waist and she was pulled tight to Abaddon’s front. “I’ve got you.” The smile that followed was small and happy, and Ruby couldn’t stop her mind and heart from racing. 

Skin. Ruby could feel Abaddon’s hands on her—both pressed flat, one above the other, leaving the bottom hand resting on her lower back, pinkie finger falling dangerously low. They were so soft and Ruby couldn’t help the shiver when Abaddon stroked a thumb across the ridges of her spine. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

“It’s all right. I should have known not to mention it. Were I in your position, it would have been shocking, too.” Her voice was free of judgement, like she was expecting Ruby to be frightened of her.

“It just makes me sick thinking how they did this to you. Your own siblings?” Ruby took the chance of their position to rest her hands in a show of comfort on Abaddon’s upper arms and the goddess hummed her approval.

“My father taught us to be ruthless. And it stuck with all but one of us.”

“You?”

Abaddon laughed lightly. “No, one of my younger brothers, Crowley. He didn’t turn out hardened like the rest of us, just apathetic about most things. Except for that yappy mutt of his—he loves that stupid thing. He called her Juliet. What an atrocious name for a dog.” She scrunched her nose up at the thought.

Ruby smiled at Abaddon’s musings, but a slight frown followed quickly after it. “Why did they kill you? Are the legends true?” The words were spoken quietly and a part of her wasn’t sure she wanted to hear the answer. She had to know, didn’t she? Even love cannot cause blind trust.

“Well, that depends. What do your legends say?”

Ruby’s brow furrowed deeper. “The elders taught us that you were attempting to perform a dark spell. One to raise an army of the damned to fight for you against the people who thought you were a demon inhabiting the body of a woman. They said the spell required the slaughter of twenty children and had the others not stopped you, you would have succeeded.”

Abaddon adopted a matching expression, brow drawn tight and jaw set. Her face showed disappointment and anger, but when her voice came out, it held only hurt. “They got it wrong.” 

Ruby didn’t even open her mouth to speak, just waited for the goddess to continue. She sighed heavily before pulling Ruby tighter to her in a true hug. Ruby closed her eyes, wrapped her arms up around Abaddon’s shoulders and breathed in her scent. Sage, eucalyptus, and something else that she couldn’t quite place.

“I wasn’t trying to raise an army and I’m not sure where they got that idea in the first place. However, I was trying to bring back a person. Just one. My older brother, Gabriel. He had been murdered by a now-estranged family member and I just… I missed him. He was my favorite and I was his. I know you aren’t supposed to pick favorites in family, but we did.”

Ruby picked her head up and nuzzled her nose against the soft skin of Abaddon’s cheek. “It’s acceptable to pick favorites. I can’t fault you for it.”

Abaddon’s hands rubbed her bare back lightly. “He was always just so funny and smart. And he liked me because I didn’t take any nonsense from the others. I stood up for myself. Made my own choices.

“It just killed me to see him underground like that. He was so full of life and light, you know? I always assumed he would never die.” Abaddon took a second to breathe before she nudged her nose and mouth to rest in Ruby’s wavy hair. “I’ll assume you know the stories about him?”

“Gabriel? Yes, of course. He was one of the chosen few that was to fight alongside your father if the need ever arose. They were his warriors and guardians.” Ruby paused. “Were you one of them?”

She chuckled. “No, sweet girl. Only the boys got to play the fighter. Our jobs, as ladies, was mostly to heal things, help things, grow things, and stay the fuck out of everyone else’s way. It was boring.”

“So, you chose your own path? You weren’t bound to your duty?”

“That’s right. I was supposed to be in charge of… what did father call it? Festive foliage. He wanted me to decorate the trees and grasses when the seasons would change. Dew for spring, frost for winter, and I got to pull all of the leaves down when fall came about. But who would want to worship the goddess of that? What purpose did I serve other than to make everything look pretty? No, this was better.”

“So, you were trying to bring Gabriel back?”

“Yes, but I failed. I had magic at the time, sure, but I didn’t know best how to control it. So, I took it upon me to perform the first resurrection spell I came across. Clearly, that’s what I get for being impatient. It didn’t work—it actually did the opposite of what I needed it to do—and because the magic got out of control, it alerted my family that I was practicing outside of my ‘scope of work’.” Her last words were disgusted and clipped.

Ruby gave Abaddon’s shoulders a squeeze and brought her head to lay in the crook of the redhead’s neck. She could feel the sutures pressing into her forehead, but as long as she didn’t directly look she could ignore it. It didn’t feel gross like she thought it would, anyway.

“But you—” Abaddon pulled back to hold Ruby at arm’s length. “—did incredible. Your spell was flawless. You did everything exactly by the book. Just the way I wrote it,” she said with a wink.

Ruby’s eyes grew wide. “You wrote that spell in hopes that someone would find it and bring you back?”

“Girl’s got to have an escape plan, right?” Abaddon chuckled at herself.

“How did you know someone would find it? And how did you know someone would use it to bring specifically you back?”

Abaddon tilted her head in a slight acknowledgement of Ruby’s point. “I didn’t really. It would work to bring any bound god back to life. I just had hoped that someone would find it and help me.” Abaddon smoothed her hand over Ruby’s hair in a gentle pet and Ruby couldn’t help leaning into it. “And here you are.”

Ruby nodded before laughing lightly at herself. “I’m sorry I’ve asked so many questions.”

“It’s all right. I don’t mind telling you these things. These are things you share with the person you love, right?”


	6. Chapter 6

“You love me?” The heat that had been filling Ruby’s chest made an appearance on her cheeks. She had to sit down on the smooth steps before she fell over. At least the stone was able to cool some of the heat that was rushing through her limbs.

“Of course I do. You’ve been so good to me, so loyal. You believed me when the others wouldn’t.”

“I just knew the elders and the rest of my people couldn’t be right. In all the stories we were told you never seemed evil. You chose a path that was different than they expected of you. That’s nothing to punish you for.”

“And yet…” Abaddon laughed as she sat down beside Ruby. 

The brunette instinctively curled her knees to her chest to cover her exposed body. She wasn’t necessarily uncomfortable being naked around the goddess, but she supposed modesty wouldn’t hurt. Ruby held eye contact with Abaddon until she bent slightly to press a kiss to the joint of her arm and shoulder, red curls mixing with her own brown.

After a pause, the kisses trailed upward, one by one to her neck. “You know you don’t need to hide yourself from me.” Next, her mouth was nibbling at Ruby’s ear, gently nipping and sucking. “I think you’re beautiful.”

The heat flared in her chest again and the blush that she hoped had started to subside clearly hadn’t. “Th-thank you.” Graceful. Really. She couldn’t even speak to Abaddon without tripping over her words.

Abaddon chuckled. “Will you please turn your head so I can kiss you?”

When Ruby moved, she didn’t even have more than two seconds before Abaddon’s lips were on hers and there were hands laced into her brown hair. The lips were plush and warm against hers, and she could have kicked herself for not moving immediately. It took a few seconds for her brain to fire up and actually return the kiss. When she did it was heavenly, though.

Their tongues slowly glided along one another, tasting and feeling everything they could. It wasn’t the hard crash of teeth and tongue that Ruby thought she would need out of her first kiss with the goddess, but this simpleness was somehow more. It was elegant, graceful, any number of things. But it wasn’t hurried and that made it better.

Abaddon licked once to the roof of Ruby’s mouth before breaking the kiss. She didn’t pull back though, keeping their foreheads pressed together. “May I touch you?” Her voice was just a whisper against Ruby’s lips.

She had every intention of vocalizing a response, but she failed. Her heartbeat was rough and she swallowed thickly before nodding. She didn’t care how or why, but she needed more of Abaddon’s skin against hers.

The kiss resumed and Abaddon nibbled lightly at her lower lip, one hand still threaded in her hair while the other—oh god. Ruby moaned into Abaddon’s open mouth as the tip of one finger slid into the heat between her legs, running over her clit and all the way down to the source of her wetness. She hadn’t even realized that just kissing could do that.

Abaddon broke the kiss again and looked at Ruby—her eyes were glazed over and just the slight touch was enough to make her breathing uneven. When Abaddon started to tug gently at her ankles was when Ruby realized her knees were still pulled up to her chest. She slowly began to lower them, placing her feet on the ground at the base of the obelisk steps.

“What a sight you are, darling.” Abaddon murmured against Ruby’s skin as she began kissing her way from ankle to thigh, slowly parting Ruby’s legs in the process. With legs wide, shoulders resting on the top step of the monument, and back slightly arched to accommodate the few steps between, she could believe she was indeed a sight.

Her thoughts were sidetracked when she felt Abaddon’s lips settle for a light kiss against the inside of her very upper thigh. Ruby shivered and looked down the length of her body in time to see Abaddon’s tongue make a slow, light trail around her clit. The moan that came as a result of it was barely controllable, and she bit down tight onto her lip.

Abaddon’s smile was wide as she lifted her mouth away for a small second to say, “From the way you sound right now, you’re either very close or it’s been a long time since you’ve had this.”

The damned blush returned as Ruby whispered, “I’ve… I’ve never really done this before.” Whatever thoughts were going through Abaddon’s mind, she looked pleased as punch. It wasn’t long before she found out why.

Abaddon buried her face between Ruby’s legs, less using just her tongue and instead using her whole mouth. The feel of it was absolutely incredible. She was still gentle in her touch, but that much contact and stimulation was wreaking havoc on Ruby’s system. She whimpered as Abaddon sealed her lips around the folds of skin and suckled lightly, her nose rubbing against the little nub that sent warmth spreading through her body.

Ruby’s muscles were shaking with the exertion of keeping still, and she wanted to, but her hips wanted to shove forward against the mouth on her. But when Abaddon pointed her tongue and licked as far as she could inside of her, Ruby’s resolve crumbled. Her hand flew forward to dig deep in red curls while the other instinctively moved to her own breast to roll a nipple between thumb and forefinger. 

She hadn’t known it would feel that good and a groan fell from her lips. Abaddon, pleased to be pulling those noises from the girl, released her own with her tongue still lapping and teasing every inch of that soft skin. Ruby’s sweetness was remarkable.

“I… I…” Abaddon didn’t care what Ruby was trying to say. If she was going to say it, she would have to fight her way through because this was too good for her to stop. “Oh, gods.” The way her breath hitched around words made her sound close to tears. It would be a lie if Abaddon wouldn’t love to see them wetting her pale cheeks.

The similar lightness that was bordering her head on either side. Her inner thighs, the color of new chicken eggs. Beautiful. Stunning. Hers.

Ruby’s back jolted up as she felt teeth close sharp on that skin. Too sharp. She cried out and she felt two fingers press inside of her, moving deep. That push and pull against her insides was dragging the attention away from the pain on her leg, easing it to just a burn. She didn’t look down, though. She knew what had happened—figured it was bound to—and she was willing to make that small sacrifice. This was what she wanted.

Right?

That line of thinking stopped as Abaddon shifted over Ruby, pulling her up to sitting while her fingers still worked slowly in and out of her. She hadn’t realized her eyes had closed until she allowed them to open.

Abaddon’s mouth and a small portion of her chin was slicked with red. Ruby could see one drop start to roll from the corner of her lips when Abaddon surged forward to claim her mouth. What she didn’t expect was for the blood to taste so sweet. It wasn’t like the man’s. They were both warm, sure, but this was different. It was her own.

Those fingers quickened inside her and she felt warm everywhere. It was like she could feel it at the ends of her hair, too. Abaddon pulled their mouths away from one another, so Ruby’s moans, whimpers, and pleads could be heard in full. “I know you’re close, love. Just let go, all right? I’m right here.”

She nodded with another breathy moan. How had she never experienced this before? She wanted to shatter apart—fall to pieces around this woman’s fingers. 

At the same time that those pleasurable pulsations started between her legs, so did the pain again. In her neck this time, and it was much worse. When she turned her gaze to Abaddon, she caught the final moments of chewing and then a large swallow. The warmth of her orgasm and the warmth at her neck mingled together, shorting out her system. So much. Too much.

Ruby’s head swam and she looked down her front. She was coated, and not just the dried blood from earlier. Nails dug into her back as she tried to squirm from Abaddon’s hold. She needed to pack the wound and it needed to be quickly.

“Don’t struggle, sweet girl. Struggling will make it go faster, and I want to keep you with me.” Abaddon tightened her hold and pressed the girl’s naked form to her chest. “You’re so beautiful. So warm. So alive.” She gasped as Ruby’s head drooped to rest against the side of hers. The warmth from the opened gash in her neck spilled over the both of them, some of it making its way down her shoulder and back.

“Why… would you do this?” Ruby’s voice was raw, husky, fading. She had been loved. She didn’t understand anything. Why the woman she loved—and who had loved her—would do this. Spill her life into a puddle on the floor? What a fucking waste.

Abaddon tutted and shushed her, smoothing Ruby’s hair back from her forehead. “Because there are some things you don’t ever stop loving, even when someone else comes around. It’s amazing the lengths you’ll go to for family.”

Of course. She should have known better. “Gabriel?”

“Yes, darling. There were two versions to that spell. The original failed, but you’ve helped me this time. You’ve almost succeeded. Just a little bit longer and I’ll have him back.”

The sob couldn’t be helped and it was released as a jagged whimper, but quickly soothed. “Never… should have trusted you.” Ruby’s full weight finally collapsed into Abaddon’s hold.

“Why don’t you lay down for a while? You’re looking a little white.” Abaddon chuckled at herself as she leaned forward to shift Ruby’s weight to the floor. She laid small kisses to each of Ruby’s cheeks and eyelids, her forehead, nose, and mouth. Ruby didn’t move. Didn’t breathe. And for a few moments, neither did Abaddon.

She waited. It had to have worked this time. Failure again wasn’t an option. Not after such a pretty little thing; it would be such a waste.

Thunder cracked hard in the distance and Abaddon’s face shifted into a smile. Her girl had done it. Against everything she was ever told, against her first attempt, this time she had succeeded. She had won.

She had brought him back.

Abaddon stood slowly, swaying a little. Her bloodied hands gripped into her skirt leaving perfect, painted hand prints as she rushed for the exit of the temple. She took another look behind at the two bodies, left open, perfect, lifeless, just for her. Let the torches burn down on their own. No one was likely to find them anyway.

The sky was darkening as she stepped out and the wind pulled her hair back from her face. The air was cooling and she could see some lightening off over the ridge. It wouldn’t be far. She smiled at it, wider than she even felt possible.

As she moved off toward the lightning strikes, which were coming more frequently, she whispered a soft, “Oh, Gabriel?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ARCHIVE WARNING: For you all who chose to look, this story does technically contain Major and Minor Character Death. One of the people out of the main pairing will die, but I'm still not going to tell you who. You just have a lot more of a warning now. Also, there is a fair amount of blood in this, so if you're squeamish, it's not for you.
> 
> ENDING NOTES: Yes, I'm trash, and my closing two words are a reference to the movie _Van Helsing_. I couldn't help myself. Hope you all liked it!
> 
> Come hang out with me on Tumblr, I promise I don't bite:  
> SPN NSFW Multi-ship sideblog: [wingedwincest.tumblr.com](http://www.wingedwincest.tumblr.com)  
> Main blog: [castielsstarr.tumblr.com](http://www.castielsstarr.tumblr.com)


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